im screwed. its just a point of my life whereby i feel like someone should just shoot me through the head and let my brains flow out. or shoot me through the mouth and let my throat burst out. or shoot right through the heart. for you guys who dont like emo kids,you can just exit right now. cz this post will be emo.AGAIN.sorry.

1 mistake. and my life is like a roller coaster in hell.
i feel so useless.
i feel dat im not a good friend.
just cz of dat 1 stupid big mistake.
i want to make things right again.
i want things to be like wat they were before.
dats all dat i ask for. is dat alot?
and dont you guys make mistakes too?
its not like i make mistakes and you guys are perfect.
im sure you make mistakes too.
and must i apologise to the whole world abt wat i did?
when it only concerns a handful of ppl.
1 mistake of mine, and everything changes.
my life. from a meaningful and vibrant and fun life.
to something that is meaningless..lifeless..and full of regret and hate.
it just sucks to be in my current situation now.
i cant go back time to change wat happened.
if i could,i definitely would.
bt things had alrd happen. what do u expect me to do?
i alrd did my part. i admitted im wrong. i apologised to everyone dat is concerned.
what more must i do to make things go back to how it was before?

sometimes i do feel like jumping down the building.
have a taste of wat its like to fall from a high level.

sometimes i feel like cutting my own throat.
see the blood gushing out of my throat till i close my eyes.

sometimes i feel like crying till i go blind.
never will i get to see them again.

why the hell did i make a god damn bloody mistake in the 1st place?!
FUCK IT!. seriously. IRAIMI.YOU SUCK.BIG TIME.
YOU SCREWED UP.
YOU SUCK.
PERIOD.